I left the helmet in the hall, put my toddler to bed with extra careful kisses. Then I opened a message to my husband. I wanted to text, "I'm done here. Let's move back home." But I couldn't. Because we are home. And whatever the USA or Poland or other countries used to be to us, they're not home now.
You become a mother, and you start looking around at other mothers who are doing it better. They make all the baby food from scratch. Create fantastic, imagination-stimulating nurseries in coordinating colours. Maybe even sew baby clothes from organic cotton. A feeling of inferiority sets in. It's known in modern terms as "mommy guilt." Based on the amount of magazine articles, blogs, and web pages it's hugely prevalent. The cure, if there is one, seems to just be to remind yourself that you're doing the best you can for your child. And that all the other mothers are doing the same thing, so it's not worth comparing. Do what you can and don't worry about the rest. If you want to get better, take baby steps - don't give up just because you're still in progress. Enough is enough for now.
As Pippin and Bloom and I headed out the front door, we waved to two of our neighbors who were chatting by their doors. "We're going to the Varend Corso," I called. "Do you want to come?" One who has lived here for years laughed. "Oh, I've seen it about thirty times." The other, who's also a recent transplant to Maassluis, said, "I'm busy tonight, so maybe another time. But what is it?" "Um, a boat parade, from what I've heard. Plants, flowers, music, boats?" According to the website , the "Westland Flower Parade" has been an annual tradition for the last 15 or so years, and I have a soft heart for traditions. Especially brightly colored musical ones where I can take photos and feel connected to this country that has been my home for almost twelve years now. I decided to bring the kids too, but not my husband, since massive community events are not his cup of tea. (A massive community event like ...
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